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This is the page for science experiments. This may
be a terrible, terrible idea, but we’d like to conduct the
science experiments we were never able to complete as a child or
suddenly pop into our heads. Until we are evicted and lose all of
our friends, we intend to persevere against the odds and bring you
stupefying and disturbing experiments that perhaps should not be
conducted.
Do email
us your ideas and suggestions. If you would like to conduct an experiment,
that would be lovely as well. Keep us updated.
Office Fun with Glasses:
I thought the office kitchen saga resolved, to my disappointment.
However, I am pleased to report that the sink is back in action.
Check back for updates (and maybe a photo).
Day One: I notice a glass in our tiny office sink,
filled with brown, murky water and a brown sediment collecting at
the bottom.
Office Fun with Mugs:
Over a three month period, the following fascinating coffee cup
saga unfolded.
Day One: Visiting employees hold a meeting at an office,
drinking coffee and then leaving three used mugs in the sink.
Day Three: Mugs are now full of diluted coffee, dirty
water, and Cup-o-noodle soup.
Day Five: Mugs, particularly the glass one, seem to
be developing white scum on their surface.
Day 10: Mugs remain in place, liquid is now mostly
dirty water and food particles.
Day 13: Mugs seem to be losing liquid to evaporation,
but dirty circle is forming on bottom of the sink around each mug's
base.
Day 20: Liquid levels returned to full, apparently
from a tomato based soup or dish.
Day 22: The mugs, with their liquid, are moved from
the sink and lined up on the left of the sink on the counter. Rust
circles remain at the bottom of the sink.
Day 25: The liquid is halfway evaporated, leaving
a think patina of nastiness along the inside of the mugs. Particulary
disturbing on the glass mug.
Day 30: Liquid appears to be holding steady at about
1/8 of a mug.
Day 42: Mugs are moved, with their liquids, to the
right of the sink and lined up along the wall.
Day 46: No change.
Day 55: No change.
Day 73: No change.
Day 88: The mugs seem to have moved in and set up
housekeeping. I imagine that even if we tried to move or clean them,
they have sealed themselves to the counter and made their grime
immovable.
Day 102: Tragically, the mugs were washed, the sink
cleaned, and we are now on much tighter discipline in the kitchen.
Much more pleasant, but the experiment has been shut down!
Snow & Ice:
Recently, all of Portland carried out a most satisfying
experiment involving snow and ice. The storm was supposed to blow
into town on Monday afternoon, dumping inches and inches of snow.
Businesses closed early and everyone stocked up for the storm of
the century. Local TV stations went crazy. The temperature hovered
in the teens and low twenties -- cold for Portland! The snow began
to fall sometime after midnight, and by 6 am there were inches and
inches of very dry snow. Schools closed, governments shut down,
buses were slowed, businesses never opened. TV was nothing but storm
coverage. And it kept snowing. Wednesday was the same story. Snow.
Cold. And then the freezing rain showed. Still below freezing, the
snow and ice stacked up. The weird roof of the YMCA Pool collapsed.
People fell. Idiots drove while talking on their cell phones. Snow
plows labored. People forgot to shovel their sidewalks. Parties
were thrown. And then it began to melt. But slowly, so there was
no flooding. Two weeks later, piles of dirty snow still hide in
corners, but mostly there are only fond memories of the slow week
in Portland. And 40s and rain never looked so good!
Hairy Animals:
Look at Erica is conducting her experiment with a wombat. We should
all be inspired by her example and begin developing intense and
meaningful relationship with hairy creatures. The following questions
should then be asked: 1) Are you happier? 2) Do you have hairballs?
3) If so, what did the doctor say? 4) Are you more in touch with
your feelings? 5) Does the hairy animal care?
Feel free to email in your results.
Ancient Fridge Food:
Ben’s Blueberries, our experiment on blueberries living in
a fridge inside tupperware, have been destroyed. There is much mourning
in the scientific community. He replaced them with a tuna-noodle-mushroom
soup casserole, which was an interesting grey substance. This, too,
was destroyed. I conducted an intriguing experiment with cilantro
inside a plastic bag inside a fridge. Cilantro liquifies and turns
brown after 3 weeks, and I grew scared.
Dissolving Miracles:
A cola science experiment – what does dissolve in cola? How
fast does it dissolve? Does it smell? Fizzle? Let’s start
with cat nails, dog nails, and human nails – is there a difference?
What happens if it is a diet cola? |
